I will remember the deeds of the Lord;
yes, I will remember your wonders of old
I will ponder all your work
and meditate on your mighty deeds.
Your way, O God, is holy.
What God is great like our God?
You are the God who works wonders;
Psalm 77:11-14

When is the last time you took time to ponder the God of wonders?
Take time this Christmas to sit at the feet of Jesus and remember His mighty deeds.

As I sit here and ponder the last six years, I can’t help but be amazed at God’s goodness and His sweet mercies. Where on earth did the time go—six years here in this two-bedroom townhome, already? WOW, if someone had told me I would be living in a two-bedroom townhome for the next six years with a family of six, I would have told them they are crazy! I can’t do that and I won’t do that! It’s a good thing that when I moved here, I did not know we would be here for six years. God is so good to just give us a little at a time.

With less than nine days before we move from here, I can’t help but recall the last six years and all that happened here. Let’s see…..we moved here from New York City having no idea what we were doing in life and what God would be doing with us. When we moved, Kaylin was eight, Brittanie was six, Madison was five months, and no Nathaniel yet.

Kaylin and Brittanie had only ever been to Christian private school, but when we moved here, we would be putting them in public school. I made sure to live in the best school district even if that meant living in something small. I was terrified of putting them in public school, but to me that was my only option, as we couldn’t afford private school and homeschool would NEVER be an option for me. When someone tells you, never to say never make sure you really listen. God loves it when we say never.

A year later I found out I was pregnant with Nathaniel. Surprise….Surprise….Surprise!! Again, never try to tell God your own plans. Did you here me? NEVER!! After all it does say in the bible that His ways are not our ways. I must have missed that somewhere along the way. When Nathaniel was born we only had one mode of transportation and he did not fit in the car. So for the next 5 months we would not be able to travel together as a whole family, and when we went to church that meant taking two trips to get there. I either had to take Adam to work or be with out a car for the rest of the day. It happened quiet often that I was without transportation. Oh my goodness I can’t help but laugh at this☺. I remember getting everyone ready and putting Madi and Nathaniel in the stroller and walking Kaylin and Britt up the gigantic hill a half mile to their school in the freezing cold. And why did I say I would never homeschool? I could have avoided this torture! Thankfully God provided another vehicle for us, all be it turquoise blue and looking like the Jetsons mobile. But man oh man was I ever thankful for this car! Little did I know I would still be driving it around today with over 250,000 miles on it. It won’t die!!!

And poor Adam was tortured by one sales job after another, all the way from selling copy machines, to frozen meat, to cars. Little did he know that when he came here he would be having to work two to three jobs at a time to support his family, even if that meant working at Chick-fil-a in the evenings and on the weekends, and going out in the middle of the night to pound signs in the ground for homebuilders. Later, he would be going to school full time and working two jobs, all the while making all A’s. I am so thankful for the husband God gave me. He is amazing!!

There is so much more I could talk about and so many memories from these last six years I could share, but the most important is how God was always faithful and provided continually even during the most trying times for us. And the greatest work He did was in our hearts. I can honestly say I am thankful for where He put us, because I wouldn’t be who I am today without it. I love that as I ponder the last six years I can laugh about everything we went through. It really is quite comical. And to think our story is not even close to being over. He is still working in our hearts and making us who He wants us to be until that day we meet Him face to face.

So as we close the door here in this home I am actually a little sad to leave the home God did so much in. But I am looking forward to what God will do in our new home. And I am looking forward to celebrating the birth of our Savior in our new home this Christmas. Thank you, Lord.

Wow….where did time go!? Has it really already been six months! I can’t believe it!! I never thought I would survive this time, but I did!! Now if you ask my husband, he will tell you it felt like forever!! At times it did really feel like forever, but for the most part it went fast for me. You may ask how. How did you ever manage without your husband for six months? Well, God is really…really…..really GOOD!!! He knew what my family needed during this time and boy did He ever provide exactly what we needed! His provision came in the form of a family. I love how God works through people to show His love! To think of this family overwhelms my heart with joy.

Let me start by saying I am very much looking forward to my husband returning next week. I am starting to feel giddy with excitement at the thought of going to get him and bringing him home. I miss our times of being together and just doing the simple things we enjoy. Like…having our morning coffee together before anyone wakes up, sitting on the couch in the evening, cuddling with each other, and quick dates to the grocery store. These are the things we sometimes just take for granted. He is my best friend and I have missed him.

But my heart is sad as well. Not because my husband is coming home, of course not. (My heart is very much excited about that.) But because my very special time with the Yuen family will be coming to an end. No…not to an end, I can’t say that! My time with them will always be special and will never end! It will just not be the same as it has been for the last six months. You see…we have been spending anywhere from three to five days with the Yuens almost every week for the last six months. This is something we will no longer be doing. Well, we will still have family sleepovers, but we won’t be able to have them so often. After all, that’s how it all started in the first place. It was New Years Eve and we went to the Yuens to celebrate. Our time of celebration turned into an unplanned sleepover. It was really fun!

And boy oh boy what an incredible time we had these last six months. The bonding that took place is amazing!! Our hearts are forever connected with each other. Our children’s hearts are connected with each other! After leaving the Yuen’s house and coming home for just one day, everyone is begging to go back. We never got tired of each other. We enjoyed our time together! Can you believe we celebrated almost eight birthdays together in that six month time period? We have one coming up very soon! What’s really funny is that the DOG started looking forward to our times together, too. Cosmo would start whining and crying with excitement every time we approached the tree line close to their house. Well, maybe it was because he looked forward to his times he spent running the neighborhood looking for the opposite sex.

I hate to say we had a party for the last six months, but we really did! Sometimes, though, the party has to come to an end, right?? It’s Back to the real life of making grocery shopping lists, (Running to the store four to five times a week is just really not good for the budget.) planning meals, (because I don’t think cereal will cut it for my husband), and cleaning the house more than one time a month. Doesn’t that just sound pathetic?!

And I have to say I got really good at packing and unpacking. Actually, I stopped the unpacking. I would pack everything in a big Tupperware bucket. After arriving back home, I just threw everything in the wash and threw it right back in the bucket. Who cares that the kids wore the same things every week? It was just easier! Madison and Nathaniel spent so much time with Gecko and Sam, that when they were with other children they had a hard time not calling them Sam and Gecko! And we never saw much of Brittanie and Carli, because they would completely disappear when they were together. I have to say that Carli brought out a very fun side of Brit-Brit! Brittanie started acting like Carli! And when Brittanie was not with Carli, she was bored beyond belief! They are perfect for each other! And who says teenagers are no fun and just a lot of work?! I enjoyed my time so much with KK, Joss, and Catey. They are a blast to be with!! I looked forward to just hanging out with them. And cooking, cleaning, and doing school is so much more fun when you have others to do it with you. You may be asking what about Carl? Where was he? Oh, he was around…..and benefiting very much from all the cooking going on all the time. Well sometimes we asked him to do the cooking, because after all he is awesome on the grill and makes the very best burger I’ve ever had!

So I’m sure you see why we are having a hard time letting this time go. We were blessed and God was so good to have provided this time. I am forever thankful for the Yuen family! And I will not say our time is over! If anything I look forward to the many more great times we will spend together. They have become family.

I put together a montage of our six months together, and believe me we did a lot more than just what you see, because sometimes we just forgot to take pictures.

Thank you God for showing my kids and me the joy of relationships! We have learned that being vulnerable with one another is okay. We have learned that God designed us as relational people. We have learned that God never lets us down. We have learned how to accept each other without judgment.

Thank you God, for all you have done, and all you are doing!

The other day we went river rafting with my sister's family. We spent the entire day on the river and had a blast. It was a gorgeous day in Colorado as usual. And we all enjoyed every minute of it, as you can see from our faces. Our bodies were a little sore the next day, but something we will definitely do again.






Adam and I were in the back, where it was really bumpy. There were a couple times I thought I might fall out.

The weekend of July 17-19, 2009 will be a prominent point of history in the lives of the Rutkowski family. We knew going into this weekend that it would be a whirlwind trip. Our plan was to go camping with the Webers and the Applequists. The Rutkowski’s were to arrive on Friday evening at Eleven Mile Reservoir’s luscious Backcountry campground, outside of Lake George, CO. The Webers were to arrive Saturday Morning; and the Applequists were to arrive Saturday afternoon. Alas, the Applequists were forced to take up residence in a citified RV park, as there was no room in the inn. (I guess if one expects to camp in Colorado, they have to plan far enough in advance to make reservations.) Still, though, the Applequists got to join us for the afternoon and evening, where CJ amazed us all with the “Fusion Stove”, which he claims will run on any given fuel. CJ considers this piece of “elegant design” to be the camper’s equivalent to the modified food processor on the Back to the Future Delorean. And Diane had us all salivating over their yummy Campfire Dutch Oven Pizza.


I wish we could say that this trip was made up entirely of such awe-inspiring, jaw-dropping moments. Instead, we can make claims to have dropped more than a few pounds hiking. Some of us even dropped so hard that we were left asking the question as to which was harder—the ground, or our heads.

It all started with a phone call to the campsite. Angi asked the ranger how far we would have to hike to get to these glorious backcountry campsites. The ranger responded that it was just a short quarter-mile hike. We later found out that the opinion held by this ranger told two separate stories. First, we found out that to the ranger, a hike that was well over a half-mile and included the scaling of large rock cliffs was really just the equivalent of an easy morning warm-up routine. Second, we realized that to the average lazy camper who happened to be carrying the largest ice chest ever created, a hike that exceeded a half-mile felt so much more like five miles than 0.5 miles!


This weekend was the first time I can say that I had a practical life experience that defined the law of supply and demand. The Rutkowski family easily had over five trips worth of supplies they needed to pack into this beautiful campsite. Avoiding packing our gear across this humongous hike was well worth the measly sixty-dollar charge the marina was going to stick us with for the round-trip taxi service our cargo was about to enjoy.

We had no idea that our next adventure would involve people getting hurt. Little five-year-old Madison is still trying to figure out which was worse—the old rusty fishhook that her foot stepped on, or the subsequent tetanus shot the doctor gave her. But Katie got the worse end of it, by far. She wasn’t strong enough to hold Toby back when he saw the chipmunk on the rocks by the lake. Katie’s hand got stuck in the leash, and next thing you know, she was being dragged along the granite rocks by the lake, taking a chunk out of her big toe; skinning the knuckles on her hand; and crashing her head so hard into the granite rock that her braces left a partially permanent impression on the inside of her cheek. Her eyeglasses certainly did not fair well either. One by one, many of the ladies of the campsite decided that they were determined to remember this trip, even if it required being injured to do so.


There’s still a question though, which was worse – the ladies getting hurt, or the “nasty” lady. Jen referred to the gal in the campsite across from us as a “mean nasty”. Truthfully, what kind of person is so hateful of other people that they reserve two separate but neighboring campsites all for themselves when there are only two people occupying the site? This boyfriend/girlfriend, or husband/wife only stayed in one of the two campsites, but if anyone else even stepped foot on their empty site for some innocent reason like, walking through to get to the lake to see the most beautiful sunset in the world, that person had better be wearing a helmet and a Kevlar vest. It’s guaranteed that the darts this girl spewed out of her mouth at a rate of fire equal to a machine gun were as powerful as a rocket launcher. We all felt like we needed more armor. Lucky for us, Brittanie was in the process of memorizing Ephesians 6, “putting on the whole armor of God”. Even so, this lady was mean enough to bring tears to Brittanie’s eyes…


Remember that huge ice chest? Well we figured we would turn the law of supply and demand in our favor. I certainly did not want to help Tom carry his huge ice chest back down that trail again. It was only smart that since we were demanding the taxi service from the local marina, we should also make sure we bountifully supplied the cargo. We were quite certain that the marina would agree with us that all in all, our cargo was less than it was when we started. After all, our starving stomachs felt extremely full.


Time was not on our side Sunday Morning. We had another adventure knocking at our door. Across the state, through multiple mountain ranges of mountain pine beetle infested forests, there was an honors camp for Awana waiting for our eager young daughter, Brittanie. We only had a few brief hours to travel across this state in order to get our daughter to camp on time. Oh bummer, we forgot—Adam had about 150 pages worth of reading to do in his Business Law & Ethics class, and we left the reading material in Adam’s truck! Praying for one last window of strong cell phone signal, we managed to reach Jen and Tom and they were only a few miles away. Tom would be happy to turn around and make sure Adam’s scenic view was filled with pages of nostalgic memories from Kant, Smith, and Hayek instead of the beautiful mountain ranges of Fairplay and Estes Park!

Brittanie wound up finishing her coin operated shower just about the time that Tom pulled up. (It would have been a shame for this dirty little girl to show up at the honors camp looking like Orphan Annie). Brittanie proudly flashed Adam’s filthy dirty toothbrush through the sky telling her Daddy what a great job the toothbrush did cleaning the dirt from under her toenails! Adam’s not sure he will ever brush his teeth again…

With a quick sweep of the wind and turn of the steering wheel, we were off on our next adventure. We needed to get Brittanie to the Awana Honors camp in Estes Park, fast! After only a few turns, we realized we were lost. Our sole guidance was a text-based printout from maps.google. In order to save space, Angi printed the directions as text only, with no maps. We weren’t too bad off, though. The guy in Hartsel, CO was kind enough to show us a picture of his road atlas, and after giving us a gentle ribbing for being crazy enough to take the back roads to Estes Park, he chimed in on what he felt would be the most scenic of the two different potential routes.

We fell in love with the drive from Fairplay to Breckenridge. Our only disappointment rested with the fact that we were in much too much of a hurry to be able to stop and see the sights. It was also more than a little disappointing to see the forests partially devastated by the pine beetle. But big adventures were yet to come. A word to the wise—if you are looking to have maps.google give you directions, you may want to think twice before clicking on one of the “alternate suggested routes”. Angi’s selection of an alternate route had us exiting in Idaho Springs, and heading North through Russell Gulch on Two Brothers Road. There were more than a few times that we were certain we were lost. This all gravel road had so many washboards on it, we felt as if we were being pummeled by a jackhammer. Sure it was nostalgic to see all of the extremely small mining tunnels immediately off the side of the road—but we couldn’t shake the disconcerting feeling that someone was about to pop out of the side of the road with a shotgun—and I for one was preoccupied with trying to figure out whether I was seeing a variety of mirages, or if there really were signs that read, “TRESPASSERS WILL BE SHOT COLD!!”

Eventually, by luck of an internal compass of sorts, we came out at the bottom of this windy, bumpy road, smack center in the middle of the town of Mayberry! Feeling completely lost, Adam urged Angi to stop right away and let him out. This was a very good decision. Adam’s focus centered on a bench on the sidewalk where Barney Fife and the town’s Barber, Floyd, were sitting a spell.

Adam quickly interviewed the odd couple, trying desperately to get some directions on how to get to their destination. The clock was ticking, and Brittanie was irritatingly worried. Barney and Floyd asked where we were going. Then they asked where we came from. When Adam pointed up the hill, and confirmed that we really did come from up there, the odd couple looked at each other with bulging eyes, and said, “You came down ‘Oh my God road’?” “Huh?” was all the more that Adam could mutter.” Floyd quickly pointed out that “Oh my God road” was the old wagon trail, and was also the original road into Central City, CO. The two couldn’t believe that we had just come down that crazy road.

Well, we were given directions through Nederland and Peaceful Valley, and we soon arrived at Estes Park. Brittanie was the last arrival at this week-long Christian camp, and we were on our journey home through Boulder, and down to Colorado Springs. After feeding the remaining Rutkowski clan dinner for $15 at a local Estes Park Hamburger stand, and grabbing some amazingly awesome ice cream cones down the street for $9, we decided to resist the urge to grab a hotel, and headed for home. Pinewood Springs had its own interesting sights. Over the course of that one single day, we had already encountered over a hundred bicycles on the road, some that were clearly on a short journey, and some that were packed for cross-country travel. So it shouldn’t have been a surprise to see another bike on the road, but it was… We stopped for gas and saw a man and a woman pull in on a Harley. The truth is, we saw a man and a woman, AND their South-American Parrot pulling into the gas station on their Harley! We never though a parrot could fly as a fast as an eagle, but that day we realized that given a chance, a parrot could drive as fast as an eagle could fly. What a crazy day! Shortly thereafter, we marveled at the small pieces of a beautiful rainbow we could see in the sky. Following the path of the rainbow to the other side of landscape, our eyes marveled at our next amazing sight—a woman on the paved roadway, cross-country skiing!
This gal had skis with wheels on them, and she was racing the Harley down the roadway—you know, the one with the parrot on it? Almost immediately thereafter, we realized that we were only about five minutes outside of Boulder. Suddenly these strange sights began to make a little more sense.

And from the back of the van, we started hearing noises that made us think we were watching The Wizard of Oz. Madison was chanting with growing volume, “I want to go home. I want to go home. I want to go home, now, now, now.” In chorus, Nathaniel was chanting, “I’ve got to go poop. I’ve got to go poop. I’ve got to go poop, now, now, now.” Angi and Adam found themselves wishing that they were still in Kansas, but feeling like they spent the day in the land of Oz…

Wow…… the end of year is within sight. We made it through our first year of homeschooling—something four years ago I thought was impossible when God first started to call me to homeschool. My thoughts were, “God what are you asking me to do? I can’t do that—I barely made it through school myself! This is something I feel completely incapable of succeeding at.” The whole time God was saying, “But I am. I will do it through you. I will give you what you need.” My greatest heart’s desire was that my children would know and love Him. So when He called me to homeschool I thought it was for the hearts of my children. I have come to find out it was for mine as well. I needed to trust Him with one my greatest weaknesses. I decided I was going to step out and trust Him to provide and equip me with everything I would need.

Adam and I have been married for almost 13 years and have four children, Kaylin (13), Brittanie (10), Madison (4) and Nathaniel (3). I am so thankful for the support and encouragement my husband has given me on this homeschooling adventure. He knows my weaknesses and me more than anyone, and yet he had complete faith in me.


Along with our decision to homeschool came the decision to pull Kaylin and Brittanie out of public school—something Kaylin wasn’t too happy about and something Brittanie was very excited about. Would Kaylin become resentful towards me for doing this? Was I going to survive all day at home with my kids locked away in a small two-bedroom townhome? Well, I am here to tell you I did survive and that God did amazing things in all our hearts! I can’t say it was always easy. We sailed through the first eight weeks fueled almost exclusively by excitement. I was getting the opportunity to learn. This had been one of my prayers for years, and God was now answering it. I was building better relationships with my daughters. I was seeing a heart change in Kaylin already. They were enjoying playing with each other.

Then week nine hit, and, for a time, it became an uphill battle and I wanted to quit. I was spending all day with Kaylin and Brittanie, teaching school while Madison and Nathaniel ran around like monsters destroying the house. I was starting to get tired. Nothing seemed to be going like it was supposed to. I cried out to God telling Him how unequipped I felt. I ran into so many happy homeschoolers who loved it and their children loved it. I thought my homeschool should look like everyone else’s. What was wrong with me? How come I didn’t love it?

I came to find out that I had too many “good things.” Every time I heard of a good thing in homeschooling, I thought I needed to do it. So we were getting weighed down with doing all of the huge variety of “good things.” I am so thankful for those of you that God sent into my life at just the right time to tell me to relax and to tell me that I didn’t have to do it all or know it all—that what was most important was to build relationships with my children and to develop Godly character in them.

God never told me it was going to be easy. If it were easy, I probably would not depend on Him everyday like I do now. I so desperately need Him everyday, though! I am so thankful He takes the weak and broken and does amazing things with them. God is moving in our family as we lean more into Him everyday. He is changing all of our hearts. I can’t wait to see what He does in the years to come. I was doing my devotions the other day and read Galatians 6:9, “Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary.” My prayer for next year is to relax, to enjoy my children, to fall more in love with Jesus and when I grow weary and tired……I would rest in Him who is able to provide our every need. If God can use me in my weakness, He can use anyone!